The Pontificators

PUMP UNNH PUMP UNNH PUMP UNNH PUMP… to the top of the hill. Last pump at the very crest with enough power to turn it around. Aim for the steepest angle on the street and pedal with everything you’ve got; turn the corner on to the sidewalk at full speed. If you pump hard enough and stop pedaling right there you can turn into the circle at the dead end coasting completely around, Then you coast half way back up the hill before pumping again and start from the beginningl

Do it for HOURS with the wind whipping through your hair and feeling FREEEE FREEEE!!

Then someone parked across the sidewalk just out of sight from where you turn at the dead end. Either crash and fly over the top of the car or try to turn going much too fast.

Things got very dark, people were talking very far away. They put a blanket over me until the ambulance got there. My leg feels like the letter “S.” One shoe was several houses away. No one ever found the other shoe.

The absolute worst part was when I got to the hospital and they had to CUT OFF MY FAVORITE SHORTS!!! BUMMER!!!

When I was a teenager my mother asked me to go and change my brother’s bed sheets. At sixteen I could barely contain my upset, blurting out “He is twelve years old. He can do that himself!” Her response was “He is a boy. He doesn’t need to learn how to do that.”

When I was seventeen, my boyfriend was very attentive. We were engaged but mom and dad would not give consent for us to get married. So, we were “waiting for the second” that I turned eighteen to take the plunge. He was and wasn’t a lot of things but I believe he truly did love me. However, when he bought us matching faux leather jackets in dark mustard baby diaper yellow he had to go. My love could not survive dressing alike in rude clothing.

(more…)